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Writer's pictureKelly Chisholm

5 Ways to Accept Yourself (Without Losing Yourself)




Accepting ourselves sounds like a simple enough idea. How hard can it be? After all, this is your one wild and precious life.


Surprisingly, though, many people live lives that are not true to their genuine selves. Instead, they fixate on being not just different, but other than themselves.


It’s important to acknowledge that accepting oneself can be difficult if you don’t know how.


Here are five easy ways to get started:


  1. Understand and accept yourself. An honest self-evaluation is necessary before you can come to accept yourself. Who exactly are you? What are your favorite and least favorite things? Why do you believe and act the way you do?


●      Knowing who you are might assist you in determining how accepting or rejecting you are of yourself. After you’ve figured out who you are, the next stage is to value all the pieces of yourself, both the good and the bad.


●      Self-acceptance comes naturally when you can unconditionally accept responsibility for yourself.


  1. Stop comparing yourself to others. If we are continually comparing ourselves to others, we will never accept ourselves. Yes, a certain amount of comparison may be necessary in order to change things about ourselves that truly need to be changed.


●      Accepting oneself does not imply that you do not improve and grow as a person. However, we must remember that we are all distinct individuals, and so should have a limit to how much we should resemble others.


  1. Face your fears. Don’t let your fears, particularly the fear of what others think of you, impede your success. You must be willing to do things in the unconventional ways that you believe are best, as well as to consider any feedback you receive.


●      It’s difficult to look in the mirror and see all of your flaws. However, in order to accept yourself, you must confront your fears.


  1. Choose a reliable support system. Make a list of the persons with whom you spend the most of your time.


●      Consider how they communicate with you: are they usually positive or negative? Do they support you in being yourself, or do they reject you for who you are?


●      Identify those that are primarily negative and consider whether you could spend less time with them. You might be able to eliminate them completely from your life.


●      This is not always practical, such as when a close family member is involved. However, attempt to eliminate as many negative people as possible from your life.


●      Surround yourself with those who appreciate you and want to see you succeed.


  1. Practice self-love. Fall deep in love with yourself, appreciating every aspect of your personality. Do this by embracing both your strengths and your weaknesses.


●      Be a source of warmth and understanding to yourself during difficult times or when you feel inadequate.


●      You can do this by talking gently to yourself as you would a friend. Give yourself what you need rather than waiting for someone to give it to you.


●      Also forgive yourself for past mistakes. Take responsibility and resolve to do better.


●      As you become compassionate and begin to love yourself, it becomes easier to accept yourself.


As you really accept yourself, not changing any of your unique aspects to be someone else, you will feel a weight lift off your shoulder as you experience the freedom that comes from living as who you truly are.


Avoid wasting who you are, trying to be someone else. Accept and revel in your unique self, knowing that who you are will always be enough.

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